You should get up and leave if something like that comes out of your date’s mouth. Your potential date wants to know that they’re not going to be listening to all of your horror stories and having to help you carry your baggage.
Now, most of us know or at least believe that that is code for, “I want a guy with money.” Here’s a little secret: there is only a tiny sub-section of people who can get away with listing that as a must-have, and they’re all really, really, ridiculously good looking. In any case, she didn’t tailor the profile to LISD’s audience. This isn’t so much about “thinking like a woman/man” as it is about understanding – really understanding – what it is that people are screening for when they read someone’s profile.
A request like that is tolerated from them because being really, really, ridiculously good looking comes with its own high societal value. At this point, let’s be honest – profiles are no longer about compatibility, they’re about liability.
Don’t select any of them, and definitely do not include any kind of disclaimer about how you only date this ethnicity or that one. You can allude to your sex drive or that sexual compatibility is important to you, but don’t be overt. Don’t say, “I want to have a lot of sex…with the right person.” Right away, you’re putting the sex bait out there and snatching it back. If you do, let it be a wink, not a slap across the face. I’ll go over your picture selection and ad text and let you know if your profile includes any buzz words or red flags.
I’ll also help you tweak/write your profile if it needs some freshening up.
While reading a blog post this morning, I was reminded of something that many people do when they try to craft a compelling online dating profile: They write their profile without considering what members of the opposite sex find important or attractive.
Very little consideration is given to the people actually reading the profile.
Kindness - This is a given, but it’s one of those traits that people take for granted. In those cases, they need to be with people who understand that there may be times when plans get cancelled last minute.
Any mention or perception of rigidity is going to be a mark against you.
Talking about your body type preferences will only alienate a lot of women, many of whom are women that probably fall into your preferred category.
Talking about physical characteristics in any kind of explicit detail makes you shallow. Race - Holy balls, it’s shocking that I even have to say this. Nobody wants to feel discriminated against or fetishized.
If scheduling dates with you or trying to get some face time with you is a hassle, that’s going to give someone pause.