That’s because human nature being what it is, we have a tendency to make excuses.
When we don’t like something that’s happening to us, we want it to be someone else’s fault.
Why does it feel like they are able to take control of your feelings?
Perhaps they are your employer or supervisor and it feels like they hold your career in the palm of their hand. Maybe they are just plain mean and confrontational and you are one of their favorite targets. In a moment I am going to answer that question for you, but there is a good chance you won’t like what I am about to say.
Is there someone that makes you feel intimidated or insecure? It really doesn’t matter who that person is, if at all possible, we will naturally look for ways to limit our exposure intimidation and insecurity.
Does someone you know bring out these feelings in you?
Now, I don’t expect you to just accept that without some explanation, so let’s drill down a bit and see if I can convince you.
The first thing we need to accept is this, we have the power to decide how we are going to feel about any situation.That means that our ego, with all its issues, has been pulled into the equation and we are now vulnerable to external manipulation. If you decide not to play the game, then you don’t ever need to feel intimidated again.Emotional triggers can be used to take control of people in just about any area you can think of. As soon as you choose not to grant permission to the would be source of intimidation, you render them powerless. They can still rev up their engine, but they really can’t go anywhere.We chose whether to take it personally or just blow it off.It’s imperative that we realize, the moment we take something personally we become emotionally involved. And people who want to gain an emotional edge use them to get their own way.Accepting full responsibility for your feelings is one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself.