The joke that BU girls can’t find a decent boyfriend among the student body does not stretch the truth.After two and a half years at BU, I still have not been asked out on a date.” BU women say their pickings are further reduced because some of the University’s eligible men are gay; in our survey, 11.3 percent of men identify as gay and 3.4 percent as bisexual.I would have liked to learn more about myself that you could only do when you are in a relationship with somebody.
College, it turns out, also happens to be a wakeup call: only about half (41.4 percent of female, 50.6 percent of male, and 57.1 percent of transgender/genderqueer/nonconforming/variant/cisgender students) say they had “realistic expectations” about dating when they came to BU; 48.4 percent of female respondents say their love life has been disappointing.
One anonymous female student who commented on the survey believes that dating is a thing of the past, at least among college students.
As is revealed in a BU Today survey answered by more than 4,000 students, it’s not always clear that a date is a date, it’s hard to know when a relationship is a relationship, and the best clue to the true nature of an invitation is often the time of day (or night) that it’s issued. A recent story in the New York Times titled “The End of Courtship?
” describes just how mixed up it is; it pulled in more than 400 comments from readers.
Our own nonscientific survey, which asked about such things as what constitutes a date and the usefulness of social media, discloses much about the dating preferences of students on the Charles River Campus.
Looks are less important than personality, a group date is not a real date, and online dating sites are creepy.WTBU reported last semester that speed-dating events at Hillel House were growing in popularity.George Stavros, executive director of the University’s Albert & Jessie Danielsen Institute, which counsels couples in the BU community, says it’s fine to make a first impression in the virtual world, but it’s important to start communicating in person early on.Among transgender/genderqueer/nonconforming/variant/cisgender students, 40 percent say online is one of the best places to meet romantic partners.The internet has changed much about dating, and BU students think some changes are better than others.Among students identifying themselves as male, 70.1 percent report that they do find enough romantic interests on campus.